When I walk or cycle for long enough I find that my brain begins "firing on all cylinders." That's an automotive analogy. My brain doesn't actually have cylinders inside of it, as far as I know. Anyway, yesterday on my bicycle ride I was gifted (from the heavens) some track ideas for my next music album. I present them to you now with the express wish that you do not steal them and become an instant millionaire:
Hotties on Patrol
This one is pretty straightforward. Seattle has many attractive women (the titular hotties). They're not on patrol, though, so I'm not sure why that title happened. Let's just be grateful that it did.
Ass That Won't Quit
Sex sells, and if Hotties on Patrol wasn't enough to make someone click 'buy' then surely this will be. But boy will the listener be surprised when they realize that this song is about my ass. Cycling long distances requires strong glutes. I would love to have an ass that doesn't quit.
Jesus Wants You to Take Vitamins
This one wasn't my idea. I was stopped at a red light and a man with a microphone and portable speaker was singing "Whoa-e-oh-e-oh, Jesus wants you to take vitamins. Jesus wants you to take a vitamin and mineral supplement." I am stealing this song so that I can become an instant millionaire.
I guess this last one wasn't a gift from the heavens so much as a gift from some specific fellow.
Credits: I'd like to thank Canva for making it easy and fun to generate that album cover.
